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Specializing in short, honest movie reviews.

March 19, 2012

Dream House

Despite the fact that I don't get sick, I've been sick for two weeks. The only thing I want to do is lie on the couch and watch Alaska State Troopers, which has replaced old-timey Cops as the Best Show Ever. It's like Cops with moose. Every day I drag my tired, pathetic, croaky-voiced self to work and then just count down the minutes until I can be back home, lying on my peculiarly long couch watching Alaska State Troopers.

Today I was promised that a movie would be rented that was better than Alaska State Troopers, so I agreed to watch it. The movie was Dream House starring "I Guess I Should Have Read The Script Before I Agreed To This Shit" Daniel Craig. The movie was not better than Alaska State Troopers. It wasn't even better than Cops. I wish I could punch this movie in its weak-dialogued gimmicky-plot face.

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